N.E.R.D.S. Ramble No. 216 – 7th June 2007.
Those Present – Muscles Matt, Lafayette, Froggy, Sandyballs, B.T., Bronco.
The Over The Cliffs Ramble.
Everyone met chez Lafayette for pre ramble drinkies and B.T. showed us his pictures of the last Nerdlings picnic (15 years ago). Since the Nerdlings were all about 30 now and were scattered throughout the universe, this was a bit of ramble nostalgia for us all. Everyone commented on how dark Philby’s beard was back then and how nice he looked in his trendy Basque beret. Sadly, the beret got lost , Philby got lost and all the Nerdlings are probably grandmothers by now.
The meeting continued with Sandyballs texting his dentist because of an outbreak of toothache and an agreement by the NERDS G6 summit that the next anniversary extravaganza would be held in Ireland during June 2008. (This must be to celebrate 20 years of drunkenness, excess, quarrelling and moderate exercise – bit like the average marriage, if you ask me ).
Having come to some agreement about something we all set off along the top of Newhaven cliffs in the direction of Peacehaven towards the Badgers’ Watch (pub).
It was a 2 hour walk and although the sea views were magnificent the weather was overcast and we got a bit strung out ( some of us being either older or not as fit as the rest).
Eventually we reached our lunch destination whereupon Sandyballs produced some free beer vouchers obtained by Mrs Sandyballs in Cliffe Precinct as a promotion. We couldn’t believe our luck when these were honoured – imagine , free beer! Unfortunately there was only a limited number of vouchers so the later excess had to be paid for. The food wasn’t so good, however. Matt complained about the sticky quality of his salad sauce, or something, and Bronco had a bad steak. At least we got free desserts as compensation. All in all we scored 8 free pints of beer and gratis puddings, so not too bad.
Froggy told us he was officially fat but normal (!) whatever he meant by that, and then went on to propose a Giant Google Book of Ramble Write Ups with photos to go global. Lafayette started to get a bit miffed that his own great literary talents were being held up to ridicule here and went into a simmering strop. The general consensus was that we wanted the NERDS to remain unstructured and existential.
Sandyballs decided he wanted to be alone to pursue his own form of exercise and (allegedly) began the long, solitary walk back while the rest of us just sat and drank more (at our own expense). Lafayette led everyone to the bus-stop to practise being a pensioner with his free bus pass, and next to the bus stop we saw a van parked with a woman inside giving a dog a bath (sic). Froggy thought it was a mobile brothel and wanted to join in, but it was just one of those superfluous small businesses that people with more money than sense employ to pamper their pets. (Perhaps we could all club together and give Philby a bath and makeover).
So we all had a pleasant bus ride back to The Ship in Newhaven where we eventually were joined by Sandyballs who complained about unauthorised use of the whip in his absence and grumpily bought his own beer. Did he expect us to go thirsty while he went off on a spurious training exercise? I don’t think so!
Another ramble completed then. Next month Sandyballs goes to Frankfurt to stop the Chinese invading Europe, and the rest of us will be under the masterful domination of Froggy. So prepare for regime change yet again.
Hasta la proxima vez,
Lafayette.
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