July's Ramble 2017

NERDS' Ramble No. 332 Wed. 12th July 2017.


Those Present – Sandyballs, Lafayette, Froggy, Matt, Curly, The Bish.

Special Guest – Steady Eddie.

The Devil's Own Ramble.

Starbucks'

seems to be the current watering hole of choice for the NERDS. We seem to start off from here quite frequently now. Perhaps it's indicative of the new bus-based rambles which are now taking place, and which have been thoughtfully packaged to spare our poor aged legs from having to make too much effort. Yes, lol, later on we were to see the flaw in this presumption.

And so we mingled upstairs in Starbucks with the (other) jeunesse doré of Brighton, you know, the ones that are trying to impress the opposite sex (usually) with their sense of fashion, their devotion to intellectual texts, their scintillating chat-up lines etc. etc. Anyway, the vieillesse doré sat drinking cafe stuff having sent Matt off to Marks to get some bottled water. He came back somewhat late encumbered with all the Ann Summers packages he had suddenly and inexplicably found attached to him. Hoorah! Froggy finally got the lacy under-nicks he wanted

(see Worthing ramble) and Lafayette would look nice in that red basque.

Shortly afterwards

we boarded the number 77 bus to Devil's Dyke

and were bitterly disappointed to find it was not open top. Sandyballs took this up with the driver, emphasising the fact that we were well known celebrities (ie. NERDS) with a (in fact two) famous writers amongst us, but his representations were in vain.

The bus was actually quite comfortable and kitted out in some sort of wizzy wizzy black and white paint job and cartoons obviously designed to appeal to foreign tourists. Still, at least we didn't get our hair blown off.

The journey was exciting. We passed the school where The Bish had been taught to be a Bish, we passed all the posh houses of the Brighton rich and upper classery, and we learned that Froggy's son had been given a 3d printer so that he could build a facsimile of his father

when he was absent on NERDS' rambles, and could worship him and pay tribute to his latent qualities as a brilliant literary figure and unsung rock star.

We arrived at Devil's Dyke – or more appropriately at Devil's Dyke Inn. Although the weather was a bit dull you could still see for miles, and that day there were no stupid hang gliders blocking the view or trying to kill each other in their quests for individual space.

The only snag about this pub is that the service is crap, (one person on to serve all the tourists), and the beer is crap (Black Sheep ran out almost immediately),

although as has been mentioned, the view over all of East and West Sussex goes on forever.

About midday we were joined by a Special Guest from the Gatwick Darkside (Lafayette's other minor rambling club which allows girlies to take part.) This was Steady Eddie Coombe who lived in the region and did a lot of walking. (Too much according to Lafayette, especially since he was twenty years younger than Laf. and liked to set long, long rambles before getting all the girlies pissed – but those are other stories). Ed had a drink with us

and was then initiated into the Mysteries of the NERDS (like, buy us a drink and we'll follow you anywhere.)

So he did and so we did because Ed reckoned he knew a quick route to Poynings where we were due to have lunch.

Trouble was we were all perched at the top of Devil's Dyke and Poynings was way, way far below. Also, the previous evening it had rained a lot.

Ed's route was er... a bit steep. And a bit muddy.

And a bit dead dangerous when you considered everybody's age, medical conditions and mental health (Especially this.) The Bish nearly ended up going roly poly straight to the bottom and most of us felt we had bitten off a bit more than we normally chew. However we finally achieved ground level

and were led to The Royal Oak, probably the only pub in the village.

The place was quite popular. There were lots of people eating who were not actually covered in mud and scratched to hell. Lafayette managed through his charm and charisma to blag a table for seven indoors while at the same time Matt was attempting to change tables and get everyone to sit outside where it was cold and lonely.

What was different and very effective about The Oak was that there were waiters/waitresses who came up to your table armed with a tablet to take your order and relay it straight to the kitchen. Most of us had fish and chips or sausages and mash

– NERDS have no imagination – but the quality was very good so were the puddings although the prices were a little on the steep side. Matt and Curly sat discussing the relative merits of the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling

– a programme of which they were both fans, while our waitress, Emma, obliged us by taking lots of photos of NERDS

so that the blog would have something new and fresh to show its readers.

Most of us hadn't realised that to get back to Brighton we had to climb back up to Devil's Dyke to get the bus. If you thought going down was tough try walking back up. After a “good” lunch and several pints of Harveys Lafayette was feeling the strain.

Even Matt behind whom he was struggling remarked on Laf's wheezing.

Happily the NERDS reached the top where Ed and Laf. shared a last drink before Ed disappeared back home to recover from the shock of finding out what the NERDS were really like.

Back in Brighton everyone said farewell to Sandyballs and thanked him for taking us on an interesting bus route. Ed could be blamed for turning it into a ramble the likes of which we had not seen for some time. Poynings had been an interesting village with The Royal Oak well worth a visit. Oh well back to the girlies and the Darkside for Laf. He can't get into any trouble there at least.

Next ramble Wednesday August 16th (2017)

Lafayette.

Joining Instructions July 2017

As previously indicated, the NERDS march on Wednesday 12th. This time we are going to reprise a successful bus ride/ramble from last summer - although I believe Lafayette missed out last time. We will take the 77 bus from Churchill Square up to Devil's Dyke, possibly sample some of the beverage being dispensed at the Inn, then proceed to walk to Poynings for lunch. Wonderful views can be guaranteed. Convivial company can only be hoped for.........

So the usual meet in Starbucks at Churchill Square at about 10.30-ish. Don't forget the hat and suntan cream for the open-top bus!

Sandyballs