NERDS’. MEGA WRITE-UP
RAMBLES. Nos. 122 - 126 (Without Ramble No 124 which was the Shropshire ramble and which was written about earlier……..I think…..)
Ramble No 122 Wednesday 23 June 1999 Those who took part were Lafayette, Sandyballs, and BT. We all met up at Sandyballs’; Philby was in Belgium with Bubbles, Froggy was in France trying again to join the Foreign Legion (refillé - marque de politesse). Notes record a discussion about guns and a white cat (!?). Lafayette was not feeling too good (bad bottle of calvados) so short ramble over the Downs was decided.
Nice day, sunny, warm etc. We all had a rest in the middle - skylarks swooping low over fields filled with blue speedwell (flowers), air filled with birdsong. Wish it was June every day. Lunch at the Trevor Arms - we all sat outside under the apple trees and nicked Sandyballs’ chips. Much chagrin from the latter. Cardinal Sin, all non Catholic Nerds excommunicated. How sad.
Then to Glynde House. At least BT and Lafayette did. Sandyballs sat in gardens and sulked, obviously suffering from chip deprivation. The two culture seeking Nerds had a very, very interesting tour of the House then sloped off to the tea rooms outside. Met up again with Sandyballs who was pissed and sobbing. Told him to pull himself together. Sandyballs did try really really hard but only succeeded in falling off table.
BT had huge piece of cake, about twice as big as the pile of all the chips SB had ever consumed (Yes, that Big). Everyone walked back in the sun up the hill to Sandyballs’ house. Latter immediately fled into kitchen and cooked himself chips for tea.
End of ramble!
Ramble No 123 - 26 July 1999 No notes available. Lafayette’s diary records his cycling 4.8 miles to Matt’s house in Seaford. Vaguely members getting rat-arsed in sunny garden. Vaguely remembers going somewhere in someone’s car (can’t remember where). Knows for certain no rambling took place. Nobody seemed to care.
Ramble No 124 Shropshire Ramble September 1999 See separate story. (It was really, really good. Just ask Jane.)
Ramble No 125 - 27 October 1999 Sandyballs in Kosovo or Bosnia or Afghanistan or somewhere. (Spys never tell.). Los Nierdos de aujourd’hui were BT, Philby and Lafayette. All met at Philby’s. Much drinking of gin and admiring of Twinkle (cat). Philby senior’s exotic brass pots (Now I wonder what he used them for) and Philby’s ability to make half any decent coffee using a percolator thingy.
Rambled in inebriated state towards The Boot (pub in Seaford, not far from Philby’s). Met Hamish Skiver Findlay hanging around in Seaford High Street trying to look as if he had a bad back. Went in pub (sans Hamish) met Mark Fatso, Admin Officer from Newhaven, propping up bar trying to look cool. Barmaid, Lisa, thought he looked cool (young bastard!), kept feeding him with drink and giggling inanely at his crappy wit. Lafayette considers shopping him to his CIO for pulling silly girls too easily. More mature NERDS discover Harvey’s Firecracker beer being served (such bliss). Lunch, more drink etc.
Back to Philby’s, then back to BT’s. More drink with French au pair, Audrey and her French friend. Lafayette rediscovers mature talent for chatting up au pairs in French. Audrey thinks Lafayette is handsome - “like a grandfather”, Lafayette beats a hasty retreat.
Nerds seek to portray caring image and go to park to feed ducks. Caring image going OK un til you lets off loud banger nearby and scares off ducks (and NERDS). Ramble to Tesco’s and have photo taken outside by Jessica and Lemia (who?) then to The Gardeners (Lewes pub) then to The John Harvey (another Lewes pub) where got slagged off by bossy barmaid (not Imogen, of course, she’s lovely) for demanding non existent Seaford Firecracker beer. Sad misunderstanding. It’s called Bonfire Boy in Lewes this year.
Hired taxi. Bought fish and chips. Wished Sandyballs were present so we could taunt him by nicking his chips. Maybe he’s found a good chip shop in Afghanistan, or wherever. Went back to BT’s and fed children, au pairs, grandfathers and Nerds. Consolidated Nerds caring, feeding image. Had phone call at BT’s expense. Spoke to Helen (BT’s new willy warmer) in Dieppe and to Bubbles in Belgium. Everybody seemed OK. Thought about phoning Sandyballs in Afghanistan, or wherever but thought he’d probably still be down the chip shop.
NERDS get bored with talking to foreign women and go off down to The Elephant and Castle (Lewes pub for grandfathers trying to pick up teenagers). Get bored again, phone Barbara, ask about the kids and get her to come out for a drink. Two of us play “Babyfoot”, one of us chats up Barbara, a woman nearer his own age (for a change). Philby gets loud and devastating hiccups and is escorted home on train by caring, sharing, firm but fair Lafayette3. Most of the passengers in the railway carriage slip away at the sound of Philby’s embarassing noise. End of ramble.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
So ends this interlude of nostalgia of so long ago. As these rambles were not previously published in these annals I am sure they will bring back some memories. It’s like waking from a dream being 40 years old again and suddenly realising that one is sleeping with a seventy year old!!!!!
Regards to all and we all hope Lafayette and Sandyballs get better soon.
Here's another fairy for Lafayette.
Regards to all
