March 2015 Ramble Joining Instructions

Herewith the depressing joining Instructions.

The day will be Tuesday the 17th of March

"This annual event takes place next Tuesday. Being creatures of habit we are going to repeat the ramble of last year ( and the year before that?) and make our way by bus to Rottingdean. There we will wander around aimlessly until a hostelry deigns to open to have the ritual pint of Guinness that nobody really enjoys. Thereafter lunch will probably be taken at the pub by the duckpond, whatever that is called ( you can tell, can't you, that I have deply researched this ramble). Following that we will do a ramble of sorts up by the windmill before rejoining the A259 at St. Dunstans. Then bus into Brighton and to our Holy Grail - or The Fiddler's Elbow - for some faux Irish celebrations.

Lafayette has kindly offered that we can meet at Lavender Lodge at about 10-ish. As ever, the only true Irish NERD will not be with us - however one or two half-breeds will be representing The Old Country.

I suppose one could always wear something green.....?

Sandyballs"

So much for celebrating the saint who rid Ireland of snakes!

February 2015 Ramble

NERDS' “Ramble” No 304.  26^th Feb. 2015.

Those Present – Sandyballs, Lafayette, Froggy, Matt, Paco, Curly Clarke.

Belated Guest – The Captain

The Intellectual Ramble.

It's not often that the NERDS turn from healthy, bracing physical exercise – often over the Downs or along the byeways of rural Sussex - but today the weather finally beat us and something different was called for. The rain it was raining everywhere and so, rather than get wet going to Glynde (plan a) it was decided to go somewhere in Seaford (under cover) to discuss matters of great philosophical import such as the impact of the ever ageing membership of rambling groups or the possible drain on finances of yet another continental holiday. Actually, we needed to do something about going to Prague for our 300^th in May.

The NERDS met at Seaford station – all suitably attired for the weather that day. Matt had obviously just returned from a holiday in Ireland betting on the horses judging from the look of his very cool racing trilby. Beats that shitty red cap he usually wears! Lafayette had his Old Git's ferreter's cap on which Froggy secretly coveted. Mrs Froggy had, however, banned him from getting his own “ since it would make him look like an old man” So what? The NERDS are all old men now even though Froggy's not yet old enough to get a bus pass.

However, enough of this sartorial banter. The NERDS floated down the High Street in the direction of any pub which might happen to be open and ended up at the entrance to what seemed to be a familiar place – but was it? The “Boo” (for thus it was now known, and was the proprietrix called Betty?) seemed to be standing on the site of The Boot of yore,

which had long been the meeting place of the famous Club Corona. Undeterred the NERDS stopped for a photo call and then went inside, clustering around the bar while sending Matt off to get some good seats.

The NERDS got down to business.

Sandyballs took the chair and in true managerial way immediately delegated the finding of czech accommodation to Froggy (on account of his amazing I.T. skills,

his having the most free time and the fact he was dead rich if it meant having to pay up front.) Froggy was both humbled by and proud of this responsibility.

He immediately made a list of the most important facts he needed to know;

1)What colour curtains did we want in our rooms?

2) Did we require milk chocolates or plain on our pillow?

3) Who was going to have sex with whom (No, not really), and

4) Would there be baked beans for breakfast.

Meanwhile Paco who was getting bored with all this trivia produced some really old photos he had discovered. These showed the NERDS, probably in the eighties, lounging around, looking young and dressed in the most unlikely of fashions. For example there was Sandyballs wearing a load of hippy gear (must have been a party) and looking a bit of a dipstick, B.T. looking young and suave, and people's wives looking young and scrumptious. Are how are the mighty NERDS now laid low with old age. I think it was Reg “Way, ay” Forbes

who once confided to Lafayette, “ When ya yung ya talk all the time aboot fanny,  but when ya'r old ya just talk aboot yar bad feet.” Well, who'd have thought?

But I digress. After a lively discussion (quarrel) about where to have lunch we decided on chez Diella, an italian restaurant in Seaford which Matt and Froggy had visited only the day before.

This indeed turned out to be a good bet and Froggy's recommendation of the crab bisque soup turned out to be a winner.

Halfway through the second bottle of wine we were joined by the Captain who happened to be in Seaford  grandbaby sitting.

Now the Captain had been taking his role of paterfamilias seriously and was sporting a terrible beard ( or maybe he had just got lazy in his retirement), nevertheless he suggested that if the NERDS might like to consider going to Donetz in Ukraine if Prague fell through, he might just possibly be able to swing a grant from UKIP to finance the holiday. Most of the NERDS said they thought they might prefer to go to Prague, actually.

So, after a magnificent meal the NERDS decided to meet again in a week's time to review progress on the Prague Trip. It had seemed strange not to be out rambling. Was this just a Club Corona meeting or had we now turned into NERDS – Lite? Were the two the same or were we now a cross-over aberration? Or were we all just cross dressing for fun? I'm sure Matt, our Master of Morals will be able to advise.

See you all next week for a Club Corona update on NERDS' progress.

Lafayette.